Month: July 2018

Last But Never Least

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My days since leaving work have been packed. How did I get everything done while working eight or more hours a day? I just didn’t, that’s how.

“So Jen, what have you been filling your time with?”  you ask.

Well, in addition to lots of business research, I’ve been working on several long neglected projects around the nest. Mostly though, giving my time and attention to those I love the most–specifically helping my daughter Julia and her husband Danny pack up and get ready for their move to the Windy City.

I have written quite a bit about my Vegans (a.k.a my son Jake and his family), and I have written about Olivia (my comedian). Julia has reminded me; however, that I have another child that I have yet to write about and she will not be left out.

Julia is my “baby girl,” And, while she may have been born last, she has never been least.

Even as a tiny girl, Julia was highly self-assured, intelligent, and unabashedly strong in her convictions–always oozing the most pronounced combination of both her parents strongest personality traits.

Like her dad, she has never pretended to like something or someone she doesn’t and is naturally good at just about everything she does. Like me, she has a preference for home, family, a few close friends, and sticking close to the nest–cooking, shopping, or swapping family gossip with me and her aunts– rather than going out or partying.

Since graduating from college, Julia has been diligently creating her own nest in Madison with Danny. This was perfect when I was spending two days a week there. We would see each other almost weekly, could easily grab a quick dinner, or hang out for a few hours after work to catch up.

Now the big city is calling her and Danny another two hours away, and I no longer have reason to work in Madison each week. So last week, we packed up the newlywed’s nest and put it in storage to wait for their new apartment to be ready.

How fun for a young couple to experiencing life in the city? What an exciting new adventure! Yet, I confess it makes my heart ache.

Julia has always been my faithful companion; eagerly tagging along on every shopping whim, sharing all types of culinary experiments, or simply watching chic flicks while painting our toenails.

I now have a little over a week to have her home all to myself.

Well…

I do have to share her with Danny and her Dad.

OK…

and, she has to work too. (I’m finding it really hard not to interrupt her office hours just to check in and see what she’s up to.)

Still, I’m glad to have even a little time with her.

Julia is amazingly responsible and resourceful. I have no doubt about her and Danny’s success on this next adventure.

As for me, I’ll take on the big city just so I can spend time with my baby girl.

 

 

 

What Ifs….?

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Since my last post, I’ve been pouring over business ideas and the logistics around getting started. By last Thursday, I was wracked with anxiety and fear. Am I just a crazy person, what if this doesn’t work, what if Grumpa or I have an accident and can’t pay our bills, what if, what if, what if?

Then I had a conversation with my Baby Girl. (BTW–Baby Girl is a 24 year-old grown woman with a husband and career.) After listening to all my what ifs, this wise little old soul says to me, “Mom…”

  • “What if you were 19 years old and pregnant by a boy you barely knew?”
  • “What if that boy moved you and your kids four hours away from your family and friends?”
  • “What if you set aside your own dreams for the last 20+ years to make sure your kids had theirs?”

“Mom, you were pretty successful with all these what ifs, I think you’ll be successful with anything!”

My Funny Girl has been checking in with me every day filling me with ideas and inspiration. And, my Vegans are ready to listen and offer practical advise.

I also went back and re-read all your encouraging comments on Facebook. I am simply overwhelmed by everyone’s prayers, love, support, and confidence in me.

I can’t even express how much this all means to me! Thank you, thank you, thank you!

All these shots of encouragement have renewed my confidence and I’ve become a woman possessed. I put on my walkin’ shoes and started pounding the pavement visiting area small businesses and picking the brains of some local entrepreneurs.

Now, I’m actually mapping out a real business plan and scheduling meetings to see if we can really make this thing happen. Once again, I’m doing things I never thought I’d do.

With all my heart I want to follow God’s plan for my life while living in my “Element.” Does this mean I’m trying to have my cake and eat it too?  Honestly, I don’t know. I don’t know where any of this will lead, but I can’t seem to stop taking steps toward the possibilities.

The next couple of weeks will be research filled, as well as helping Baby Girl and her Hubby move to start their next adventure (that’s a story for next time).

Thank you all again for listening and encouraging me on this journey. I promise every post won’t be about business, but I will continue to keep you posted.

On a side note:

If you are currently on the roller coaster of parenting and wondering if you’ll ever be able to get off its drops, twists, and turns, I promise you will. Your feet will hit solid ground when your kids return the love, advice, and encouragement you’ve given them. I can finally say that I’m off the parenting roller coaster and am blessed to have my personal cheerleaders to coax me in to the next one.

Have a blessed week!

Planning My New Adventure

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I had a meeting at Job Service last week. I wasn’t sure what to expect, only that I was going to talk to an employment counselor about my resume and get some advise about searching for jobs.

Of course I always talk too much and the conversation came around to my dream of having my own business. The counselor asked, “What do you want your business to be?” as if this dream could actually be a reality and not just a far-fetched fantasy.

To digress just a bit, I have been wanting to have my own business for a long time, but haven’t really let the idea fully bear fruit. In the last couple of years; however, I’ve actually been articulating the dream out loud–and to more than just Grumpa and my family. In most cases, it’s been met with incredulity, “What would you want to do that for?” or “You know, that’s gonna be a lot of work!” or “You know, most small businesses fail.”

On rare occasions, I’ve had responses like the one from the job counselor. Someone who legitimately acts like this isn’t a hair-brained notion, but a real, viable option.

At these times, a new bud forms and the dream grows. “Really?” I think. “Could I actually do this? What would it take?”

It’s time to feed the dream and see how it will grow. So I’ve started with my trusty notebook and a cup of coffee. My next steps are to:

  1. Brainstorm ideas (I have a few already that I need to map out.)
  2. Check out the Small Business Development Center at the UW.
  3. Map out my network. Not just on LinkedIn, but everyone I know and who they know.
  4. Get to know other local business owners.
  5. Research and document plans for my most viable options.

I’m not looking to get rich, but need to stay solvent. My goal is to create useful, meaningful, and beautiful things or experiences for others, but I live in a small market. I have to manage expectations with reality, practicality, and restraint.

My dream business may have to start as a side gig–the important thing is to move consistently in the right direction. In the meantime, I’ll continue submit resumes, write, and focus on the things I love.

I’ll keep you all posted.

Jumping Off the Cliff

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I quit my job.

After fifteen years with the same company, I threw caution to the wind (along with my comprehensive health, dental, and vision package, 401-k match, eight+ paid holidays, and five weeks of paid vacation) and took the plunge into a world of insecurity and uncertainty.

What the heck was I thinking?

Over the last fifteen years, I’ve worked in various roles and positions–some I’ve chosen and some have been chosen for me. To toot my own horn, “this girl’s got some serious transferable skills.” Throughout this incredible journey, I’ve learned a lot about myself.

  • I can do more than I ever thought I could do.
  • Just because I can do something well, doesn’t mean I like it or it’s fulfilling.
  • I’d rather have respect and autonomy, than status and money.

I went to work as a means to an end, all the while dreaming of what I wanted to be when I grew up. My job helped help raise and support our kids, but it was always about what the company provided me and my family, not what I brought to the work. So despite all the perks, learning from and working with amazingly intelligent people, and having wonderful colleagues, I was perpetually stressed and unhappy.

Talk about a first world problem. I feel like I’ve literally just spit in the face of a tremendous blessing, yet at the same time I have an overwhelming sense that God is telling me it’s time to let go and let Him.

Here’s the thing, for years I’ve tried to direct God’s plan for my life. It’s been all about what I want, not necessarily what He wants. I truly believe this is why I’ve never been  happy despite an abundance of blessings. Throughout this 15-year journey, God has shown me what I’m good at, what brings me joy, and what I want to do now that I’ve actually grown up.

I want…

  • To create useful, meaningful things for others to use and enjoy.
  • To bring beauty and hope to peoples’ lives so they can be their best selves.
  • To build and foster relationships.
  • To continue learning, growing, and sharing life with others.

Do these things come with a good salary, paid vacations, and a great insurance package? Probably not, I may have to get a job for those things. Do I need a degree to do any of these? Maybe, but not really.

In all seriousness though, I won’t be looking for a company to provide for me going forward, but will look for a place where I’m confident in what I am bringing to the work.

I’m still scared because the cliff is already behind me, but I know I’m in the best hands possible. God is good. He (not me) is the one who will set my feet firmly back on the ground.

God bless!